Have you ever met someone incredible and thought, “I could never be with them”?

Have you ever met someone who struck you so deeply with their quality, that you saw being with them as hopeless, rather than as an invitation to step up?

I’m on Connor Beaton’s email list for two reasons:

1. I love seeing what support is available for men to be their best selves, Connor being one of the best leaders I know for this, and

2. A lot of it is relevant when read as though it’s for women, or any human being, and I try it on for myself.

And his email today hit me in a special way.

The message was — as I interpret it — that when you find a woman whom you deeply respect, and know you’d have to become a version of yourself that would have a relationship with her work, you get confronted.

She becomes a mirror for you to see all the places you have the opportunity to elevate in order to deserve her or create something amazing with her.

But, although this is confronting, you need to do that work. That doing the work is also for yourself, because you deserve to be in a partnership with a woman like that, and be with a woman who calls you up.

I post this today for everyone, not just men. If you’ve met someone that shines a light on where you haven’t yet dared to heal, grow, shine, develop, or succeed, this person is a gift to you. If they are a mirror for where you, in your current state, couldn’t make a relationship work with them, see the gold in it.

They are not a reminder of the calibre of partner you can’t have. They are a nudge, an invitation to be your best self.

But only if you have the courage and the willingness.

There are so many courses and articles out there today about how to manifest the right person or “dream man.” But what about becoming the person that would be a match?

You can manifest dream partners into your world all day long, but if you aren’t doing the work on yourself, if you shy away from the parts of yourself that need healing or development, it won’t matter.

So, in the wise words of Connor, do the work to make it work.

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