The road to recovery involves a lot less cringing and a lot more laughing.
As a recovering perfectionist, part of my lesson in life is to understand the gift of being a ‘whole’ being rather than a perfect one.
That means not only showing the pieces that are calculated and comfortable, but the pieces that are raw or confusing or dark. The pieces that, try as we might to cover them up, are undeniably apart of our humanity and of life and cannot be escaped.
Are you like me? Are you recovering from perfectionism?
The thing is, those uncomfortable parts are not to be escaped. They’re to be embraced. Not for any distinct reason other than that they’re THERE and they’re not going anywhere. And when we dare to embrace them, and my personal favourite — laugh hysterically at them — we are powerful. To embrace and laugh at and revel in our wholeness is the definition of power and having power with being yourself.
This story is short and sweet because I don’t aim to send you on a long, grovelling essay journey into this topic. I simply aim to plant this question in your brain today, to answer either now, or answer later.
What pieces of your humanity can you not embrace, revel in or laugh at?
I see some people observe their ‘imperfections’ and start strategizing; turning them into gold, finding a ‘silver lining,’ hiding them, or ‘fixing’ other people instead. (I am guilty of all of these.)
But the true power lies in — wait for it — BEING WITH your imperfections.
On the days that I can simply sit in silence, with no distractions, to reflect on my imperfections and do nothing at all, I am almighty.
And this is true for most things (from my own compass of Truth, of course).
When you can BE WITH something, or someone, you are powerful. To be with something the way it is, and the way it isn’t. To be with what’s so.
And that’s the thing about being human! You have humanity. All kinds of patterns, habits and limiting beliefs that sprinkle unworkability into your life. They’re inevitable. But can you BE WITH that? Not in a cynical, giving-up way, but in a peaceful way?
And so, as you grapple with this question, or ignore it entirely and pretend you never read it,
I wish you a moment of bliss with your imperfections, an eventual bliss with roaring laughter at what makes you human, and the courage to be all of you.
Your partner in still figuring it out,